A Rose's Thorn
by peridot mousey
Summary: When Obi-Wan is thrown into a dilemma of his own, he must fight a battle against himself. But who will save this troubled padawan - his master or himself? (It's worth reading. I promise you won't be disappointed.)
1. Blossoming Anger

A Rose's Thorn   
  


Setting : This takes place a few years before TPM. Obi-Wan is 18. Yummy, ne? The story takes place on Couresant (at the jedi temple, of course) and on Hoth where evil lurks in the darkness.   
  


Rating: PG because of disturbing scenes and perhaps a bit of language   
  


Summary : After having a mild disagreement with his padawan, Qui-Gon Jinn's temper gets the best of him. Cold words are exchanged, and a rift forms in the midst of their bond. As memories of past mistakes cloud Qui-Gon's thinking and a vicious storm of both guilt and anger pours down on Obi-Wan, the council summons them for a mission that they truly believe will help the destined pair sort out their problems.   
  


An ambassador from the frigid planet Hoth arrives with disturbing news. One year ago, a new queen ascended to the throne of Hoth. Although not of royal lineage, the fallen king's dying request was for this unknown mistress to take control of the throne. Because he was a well-loved and respected king, the people obeyed his command. But, there was a bit of suspicion surrounding this unknown mistress as the months passed by. After many duties were ignored and galactic rules were broken, the jedi council sent a small team to investigate. According to the ambassador, the team suddenly vanished one day without a trace. The council being unsure of the ambassador's accuracy yet truly concerned for the well-being of the jedi team involved, decides to send its best - even though they are presently at their worst - team to solve this dilemma.   
  


When Obi-Wan is thrown into a dilemma of his own, he must fight a battle against himself. But who will save this troubled padawan - his master or himself?   
  


Disclaimer : I don't own any part of Star Wars, although I must admit, I think we all secretly wish for our own personal evil Obi-Wan slave dressed in black, chained up, and only able to say, "Yes, Mistress." (Well, at least Sparkling Diamond Satine shares the vision!   
  


A/N : Let me go ahead and state a few little things. I have not read the Jedi Apprentice series. I currently have #6 and #8, but that's all the cruddy library had. Plus, being a 17-year-old, AP English student, I felt -really- stupid asking too many questions about when and where the other books could be found. However, I have read some summaries, so I have a basic idea of Xanatos, the forever-faultering jedi/padawan relationship between our favorite duo, and Tahl. Since the majority of the Star Wars fan fiction community goes along with those basic points, I'll play along. However, they won't control the story, really (except the faltering relationship, but any obsessive fan of TPM could gather that something was never quite right). Just thought I would warn all of you about that. Due to my lack of detailed knowledge, some of this story may seem A/U. That's fine, in fact, I usually prefer it that way. The purpose is just to play with some ideas I have rolling around in my head. Obi-Wan just facinates me (other than his hauntingly attractive good looks), and Qui-Gon pisses me off more than any other character I have encountered (except, perhaps, Othello. He was too easily manipulated... and he just annoyed me somehow). So with that love/hate thing already established, I have to write a story! I just have to! Also, I'm going to put a random quote/lyric/whatever at the beginning of my chapters. I've seen a lot of different authors do it, and I happen to really enjoy the concept. *smiles* Now, I really happen to enjoy reviews. Although I'm writing this story to play with ideas, I tend to leave my projects unfinished because once I'm through playing, I have no reason to complete the work. So, if you enjoy this and would like me to continue, please review and let me know. Thanks so much! Enjoy! ~Nicole   
  


Chapter 1 : Blossoming Anger   
  


"I shall be telling this with a sigh 

Somewhere ages and ages hence. 

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I - 

I took the road less traveled by, 

And that has made all the difference." 

~Robert Frost   
  
  
  


  
  


Hours that each seemed to resemble an individual eternity drifted by as the weary jedi master pondered over the day's events. Scenes re-played themselves over-and-over again in his mind to a point of agony. He ran a slightly-calloused hand through his long locks as anger began to dwell deeply in his green eyes. One thought stood out in the midst of the confusion swirled with anger in Qui-Gon Jinn's mind, "He defied me."   
  


Although the dispute was nothing ultimately significant, guilt continued to be tossed around in the enticing, sea-change eyes of the young padawan. Beads of sweat gently rolled down his forehead, past those haunting orbs, and down past the small cleft in his chin. He constantly sorted through images and words from the day's tragedy. He ran a hand through his short, copper locks until his reached the small ponytail on the back of his head. He let out a sigh as the realization finally set in, "I defied him."   
  


The seemingly destined, yet ultimately star-crossed team of Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi had been given a simple project to research until an appropriate solution was found. What should be done to monitor and study the natural environment on Yavin and its moons without harming it? After researching and making several trips to the planet, the pair each had a very different evaluation of their own.   
  


"Master Jinn, what is your solution?" Master Windu had asked with the expectance of a complex, yet ultimately perfect answer from the best team in the temple. 

"Leave the environment alone. Perhaps station a few recording devices in an unnoticeable location, but ultimately leave the planet and its moons alone. By sending research teams, the 'natural' aspect of the research has already been tampered with, for things must be adapted in order for a team to live and work there. I say it isn't worth wasting our efforts over, so leave the environment to itself," Qui-Gon had stated. 

"But, Master Jinn, unless we are able to gather information about the planet's natural environment, we will never understand what killed the army that was previously stationed there. You have completely ignored the purpose of your assigned project," Master Windu had said.   
  


"I saw no purpose in the assigned project. There are plenty of galactic disputes we could be settling, yet instead you insist on giving us a task best aimed at the least-trained teams," Qui-Gon had retorted.   
  


"And because of your defiance, you act even worse than the least-trained teams. I'm still amazed Obi-Wan chose a life with you over farming," Mace had replied, then suddenly he had turned his attention to the young yet esteemed padawan at Master Jinn's side. "Tell me, Obi-Wan, do you agree with your master's evaluation of the problem?"   
  


"No, Master Windu, I do not," Obi-Wan had replied softly.   
  


The young padawan had suddenly felt a sharp, nearly painful, tug on the bond his shared with his master. Usually during the not-so-rare moments when he felt such a tug, he would turn and stare obediently at his master, and in return, Qui-Gon would sigh and give a look of reassurance. But this time, Obi-Wan had stepped forward and gave a slight bow to the masters before him.   
  


"I believe, Masters, that a small team should be sent. Not one as big as the previously stationed army, but big enough to conduct the appropriate research. Because there are already bases established by the army forces, they should easily be able to adapt the bases into the labs they need without doing any damage to the surrounding environment. However, for precautionary purposes, they must not conduct their experiments for a week. Within a week's time, if there are significant changes in the environment surrounding their bases, we can assume they somehow caused a problem, and we shall think of another solution. If nothing is changed, they may go to their research without any further conflicting issues from the jedi," Obi-Wan had stated.   
  


"Well said, young Obi-Wan. I admire your obvious effort to answer such a simple task. Although in normal circumstances we would have given this to a less-established team, I wanted a quick and precise response, which you have given me. Thank you, young Obi-Wan, you and your master are dismissed," Master Windu had said, giving a warm smile to Obi-Wan and a near glare to Qui-Gon.   
  


Both had bowed and walked away from the council chamber, but no words were exchanged between the two. They returned to their shared quarters without saying anything to each other. Qui-Gon was too furious to speak, and Obi-Wan knew it was best to say nothing, for at such a moment, silence truly is golden.   
  


As the afternoon hours drifted by, Qui-Gon's anger blossomed into an ugly, thorny flower that was watered by the tears the distorted thoughts roaming through his mind caused him. There had been one other to turn against the grand Master Jinn - Xanatos. Although Obi-Wan had committed no crime or showed any true defiance against his nature, a certain familiar anger was being to linger in Qui-Gon's soul. Although the anger was not and could not ever be directed at Xanatos, it was too easy for it to form in him against his padawan. Perhaps if Qui-Gon Jinn cared for someone other than Qui-Gon Jinn, he would see the brilliant nature and blessed gift of his padawan, but with the memory of Xanatos, Qui-Gon became absorbed with himself and no other. Xanatos could defy and still bring about love from his former master. Obi-Wan could seem to defy and bring about pure anger from his master. Such distortions danced in Qui-Gon's mind.   
  


Guilt scratched and scraped against Obi-Wan's heart until it successfully managed to tear a hole in it. He hadn't meant to defy his master; he loved his master with every piece of his heart and only wished to be obedient. Defiance simply was not in Obi-Wan Kenobi's nature; it was an established fact to everyone except the one who should have been the first to notice such an admirable quality. Slowly feelings of anger began to stitch the guilty wound back together. Why should he be so distraught when Qui-Gon's defiance was the very source of their problem? He had completed the task and saved them from the ridicule of the jedi council. He saved their reputation. Yet, despite the obvious facts, Qui-Gon still insisted on giving Obi-Wan the classic silent treatment like a spoiled child. Anger, although not often felt so strongly by the young padawan, eased the pain caused from the guilt Qui-Gon inflicted upon him.   
  


A faint knock upon their door broke the deafening silence. Obi-Wan, eager to speak to someone, strolled toward the door with his effortless, cat-like grace and gently pulled it open. He looked down and offered his trademark smile to the young padawan girl before him. She couldn't have been older than twelve, he assumed, for a certain twinkle danced in her eyes that only a child could still know. Freckles adorned her round face and a long red braid swung behind her.   
  


"Padawan Kenobi," she said with a hint of a lisp yet an extreme effort for ultimate politeness, "the council wishes to see you and Master Jinn."   
  


"Oh really?" he inquired.   
  


"Yes, sir," the child replied with a quick nod of her head.   
  


"Well, if they wanted to see us, why didn't they come and knock upon my door? Perhaps they knew a sweet, little girl is much more convincing than that little green troll they usually send?" Obi-Wan asked.   
  


The young girl suddenly burst into a fit of giggles, and Obi-Wan smiled. "When would the council like to see us, hm?" he asked.   
  


"As soon as possible," she stated after regaining her composure.   
  


"Well then, tell them we shall be there momentarily. I will go inform my master right away," Obi-Wan said. "And do tell them next time to send that little, green troll. It's much easier to decline the council's invitation and reschedule with that creature that grunts instead of giggles. The giggles win me over every time."   
  


With another giggle fit, the young girl skipped down the hallway to return the message to the council. Obi-Wan's smile remained until he closed the door and leaned against it. He allowed himself a short sigh before walking toward his master's room. He paused outside Qui-Gon's closed door, then gave it a slight tap.   
  


"Master," Obi-Wan stated, "the council has sent for us. They wish to see us immediately."   
  


"How delightful," Qui-Gon murmured as he arose and opened his door. He refused to meet his padawan's gaze; instead, he brushed past Obi-Wan and said, "I wonder what they need your divine wisdom for this time."   
  


Obi-Wan was taken aback by the cruelty dripping from Qui-Gon's tone, yet the anger inside caused his heart to throb a little after each beat. "If they were seeking my wisdom, they would have sent for me alone," Obi-Wan retorted.   
  


"They never ask for a padawan alone," Qui-Gon murmered.   
  


"They never have a defiant master with an obedient padawan," Obi-Wan stated.   
  


"You think that's the case?" Qui-Gon inquired.   
  


"Well, yes actually..." Obi-Wan replied.   
  


"I defy the council when they assign meaningless tasks. You defied me when I tried to prove a point to them," Qui-Gon said, his temper slowly taking over in his words.   
  


"You defied the council because you didn't want to complete their task. Meaningless, perhaps, but still it was assigned. You defied the council, also, by not completing their task. Your defiance proves my point. I remained obedient to the council, and, forgive me, Master, but they are not the ones to defy," Obi-Wan stated.   
  


"But it is perfectly justified in your eyes to defy me?" Qui-Gon inquired, burning inside from his temper.   
  


"I didn't defy you. I completed our assigned task. It was your choice not to do it, but-" Obi-Wan started, but Qui-Gon quickly cut him off.   
  


"They think of you as such a lovely little rose, Obi-Wan. They think you blossom with such intellect and talent. But, Padawan, every rose has its thorns. You are nothing but a thorn in my side. Never forget that," Qui-Gon stated as he walked out into the hallway, leaving Obi-Wan staring in complete shock.   
  


"What have I done," Obi-Wan murmured as guilt began to consume his heart again. He slowly stepped into the hallway and trailed far behind his master. "Master... master, what have I done? I'm sorry, Master," he called through their bond, but Qui-Gon's only response was that sudden, sharp tug.   
  



	2. Fallen Petals

A Rose's Thorn   
  


A/N : Hi again! Thanks for the reviews! You truly don't know how happy I was to see the nice comments. *smiles* So, after spending a little time pondering over the plot, I've come up with a little chapter. Hopefully it will be alright. It's tragic, really, I know exactly how I want the latter half of the story to go... I just have to figure out how to get there. So, I'm trying and playing, and hopefully this will be great. I did promise this would be worth reading, so enjoy. ~Nicole   
  
  
  


Chapter 2 : Fallen Petals   
  


"If Shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine. 

If it had a home it would be in my eyes. 

Would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this? 

Well, here we go now one more time." 

~Lifehouse : Sick Cycle Carousel   
  
  
  
  
  


As the sun gently began its descent toward its nightly slumber, Qui-Gon Jinn strolled around the twists and turns of the Jedi Temple with long strides. He wanted to distance himself from his padawan until his temper was given the appropriate length of time required for it to calm down and forget all troubles. However, Obi-Wan's persistent cries through their bond were hard to ignore. "He defied me," Qui-Gon reminded himself, replying to his padawan with the sudden, sharp tug he was accustomed to receiving in times of scolding and need for correction.   
  


Obi-Wan's sea-change orbs drifted around, taking in every detail as though he forced himself into a trance of sorts. He was desperately searching for something, anything, to take his mind off the present. The more he tried to distract himself, the more his thoughts centered around what was inevitable to avoid. Although he had truly done nothing wrong, his master was furious with him. Guilt draped over his weary, tension-filled shoulders like a thick, heavy blanket in the middle of a summer's day - unwanted and bothersome. As he pushed guilt's blanket off, the cold, biting chill of anger wrapped its arms around Obi-Wan and filled his weary heart with a will to go on. It was wrong, he knew that much, but why should he continue to resist anger when his master so frequently displayed it?   
  


As Qui-Gon stepped into the council chambers, the eyes of each master before him gave him a quizzical expression as if to ask, "Where is Padawan Kenobi?" But, before Qui-Gon could flatter himself with attention, Obi-Wan quickly arrived and gave the polite and proper bow to the masters. Suddenly, their attentions were directed to the darkest corner in the room where three heavily-cloaked individuals stood. A few aimless questions drifted through the minds of the star-crossed master and padawan, but they were interrupted before answers could form.   
  


"This is Ambassador Wespero of Hoth," Mace Windu announced, staring at both master and padawan briefly before continuing. "The people are in need of further jedi assistance."   
  


"Yes, we are in grave need of your help," Wespero said in a tone both gentle and demanding. After a moment of hesitation, he took a few steps closer to the pair. With a nervous hand, he moved the hood of the cloak back just enough to reveal his marble-like skin, a mixture of blue and white. His eyes, a deep sapphire hue, stared with a haunting pain glistening within. "Forgive us," he murmured, "my attendants and I must keep these cloaks on, for we are extremely sensitive to light."   
  


"Alright, it is. Offended us, you have not. Continue," stated the astute, green troll seated next to Master Windu.   
  


With a terse nod of his head, Wespero gave a quick glance to the two accompanying him as if to be sure they seemed at ease. He shifted his weight from his left foot to his right as he took a moment to gather his thoughts. "About one year ago, Hoth's grandest king, King Kelakh, became very ill. He left no widow nor an heir to his mighty throne. We had thought, perhaps, an election would be necessary in deeming the next leader, but upon his deathbed, the King had one final request. He asked that we appoint a woman named Umbria to the throne. We longed to inquire the details of this woman, but we thought it best not to trouble our beloved king as he lay dying. We had blindly trusted his judgement many times, and each time he proved to be serving us by providing peace and prosperity to Hoth."   
  


Obi-Wan studied the ambassador carefully as he spoke. Something was hidden beneath Wespero's words, but he wasn't sure exactly what. Still, something kept his attention. For a few moments, guilt and anger meant nothing. There was - something - about this ambassador, his planet, his queen, the mission that kept Obi-Wan preoccupied.   
  


"We found the unknown mistress, Umbria, upon the day of King Kelakh's funeral. She had mourned and wept with the rest of us, and for awhile, she did nothing with her newly-obtained power. We assumed, then, that once again, even in death, King Kelakh had proven himself faithful to Hoth by giving us another grand leader. Months passed by, and Queen Umbria still did nothing. It was then we realized, her actions were not from mourning our late king; there was something else about her," Wespero continued. Hints of a slight accent trailed in his words, but his tone was so soft that it was nearly unnoticeable. Except to Obi-Wan, of course, who proceeded to absorb every detail.   
  


"Wes.." one of his attendants whispered, fear hanging upon her plea.   
  


"It will be alright, Vera," Wespero replied. "These people will help us."   
  


"Just like the last ones?" the attendant he addressed as Vera inquired.   
  


"Fear I sense in you, young one," Yoda stated gently. "Mustn't be afraid of us. Help you we shall, if you trust in us."   
  


Vera nodded her cloaked head as Yoda motioned for Wespero to continue. "Queen Umbria did nothing for the people. When affairs concerning Hoth were to be addressed in the Senate, she refused to attend. When galactic fees were due, she refused to pay. When disputes arose among the people, she refused to settle them. She would give excuses for awhile about being lost in grief and about being a mere woman with no knowledge of politics, but one day her excuses stopped. That was when the jedi knights came to help us. There were four then - Master Xylo Ari, Master Zemla-Pa Kistra, Master Viatrix Warde, and Master Kallos Prey-nar. They each went about gathering research, and we thought they could help us. But, one day Queen Umbria called them into a meeting..." Wespero continued, then slowly his words trailed off.   
  


"What... what happened?" Obi-Wan inquired, enthralled with the details.   
  


"None of us know exactly. The jedi knights were called into the throne room, and the doors were bolted shut. We heard the most horrid screams, but I, personally, do not believe they were killed. It was a different sort of scream. A scream as though something has just been stolen away from you with a promise to never be returned; a scream of agony, but not so much of physical anguish. For days we heard screams and cries of tortured souls, but one day it all became silent," Wespero stated.   
  


"But you don't think they are dead?" Obi-Wan asked.   
  


"No. It's possible, of course, but I believe something else happened. We tried to ask the Queen, but she only said that they had vanished," he replied.   
  


"And no one knows exactly what happened? No one was in the throne room except the jedi knights and the queen?" Obi-Wan questioned.   
  


Wespero shifted his weight back upon his left foot and exchanged a worried glance with his attendants. "There was one other, yes, but Quynh would never confess to anything," he said softly. "Quynh is Queen Umbria's personal attendant. She is the only one allowed in the throne room. It is extremely rare to see Quynh alone. I am quite sure she knows everything, but she would never speak against the queen."   
  


"And why do you go against your queen?" Qui-Gon inquired, as if ready to punish another for defiance.   
  


"Our people are suffering without a leader to guide and care for them. There is something very horrid lurking around the palace, and we want it taken care of. We are powerless, but you are not. You could help us," Vera pleaded, suddenly stepping forward, closer to Wespero. "Forgive me, but we do not have time to play twenty questions. We have risked our lives to come here. If you don't help us, our lives will be lost for nothing..."   
  


"We will help you and your people," Mace Windu said, trying to be gentle yet remaining in his classic stoic tone. "Master Jinn and Padawan Kenobi are the very best the council can offer to assist you."   
  


"Thank you, Master Windu," Vera and Wespero whispered together, bowing slightly.   
  


Mace Windu turned his attention to the master and padawan before him. Something was clearly out of place with the pair, but such a thing could not be addressed with the barely-trusting ambassador and his attendants present. "You will be leaving in the morning with Ambassor Wespero to investigate the matter."   
  


"Yes, masters," they both replied.   
  


"Late it is. Dimissed you are, get your rest, you will need it," Yoda stated with a slight nod of his wrinkled, green head.   
  


Ambassador Wespero and his two attendants slowly exited the council chamber. Mace Windu started to demand that Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stay, but his thoughts were interrupted by Obi-Wan's plea through the Force, "Please, don't address the issue. It is my fault entirely. Addressing it will only make matters worse. Master needs time to regain control of his temper. Please, Master Windu..."   
  


Master Windu gave a thoughtful frown to Obi-Wan, but he reluctantly nodded. Like everyone else present in the jedi temple, no one was able to resist Obi-Wan's innocent charms - except Qui-Gon, of course. The taller jedi strolled ahead again with his long strides, and Obi-Wan trailed slowly behind. "Master," he suddenly called out, knowing that a call through their bond would be ignored, "may I go to the gardens to meditate?"   
  


"Fine, fine," Qui-Gon murmured, moving his hand as if to dismiss his padawan.   
  


~*~   
  


Hours had passed, but Obi-Wan hadn't truly noticed. He stared aimlessly as if hoping to lose himself within the peaceful distractions of the gardens. He peered through the windows and sighed at the sight that was Couresant's closest example of night. It was dark, but not true darkness, for the cities' lights glistening all around. He returned his soft, sea-change eyes to the view around the room. Assorted exotic plants adorned the majority of the large room. A few small lamps set majestically against the windows, but Obi-Wan stared at them and willed their lights to extinguish - he hated the sight of their flickering glow at the present moment. A large fountain sat in the center of the room. He stared at the water as it leapt into the air and splashed back into its pool. As he stared, he began to change the pattern of the fountain's usual bursts of water. He made it swirl about in the air for awhile before diving back into the pool. As a hint of a smile tugged at the corners of his lips, a thought brought him and the water crashing back down to reality.   
  


"You are nothing but a thorn in my side. Never forget that."   
  


Obi-Wan cringed as the thought haunted him. He sighed and closed his tired eyes as he tried to clear his thoughts. But with each futile attempt to meditate, the same reoccurring thought taunted him. He reached through the bond he shared with master and found the older jedi to be sitting in their quarters reviewing the files on Hoth. "Master? Are you still angry with me?" he called and received that same sudden, sharp tug as a reply. "I'm sorry, Master."   
  


"Padawan Kenobi?" a voice called and caused Obi-Wan to nearly jump. He turned and gave a quick bow to the master standing before him. "Did I frighten you, Obi-Wan? You usually know I'm coming to see you before I know it myself."   
  


"I'm sorry, Master Windu, I was a bit distracted," Obi-Wan murmered.   
  


"I can see that; we all could see that. Tell me, Padawan Kenobi, what troubles you?" Mace inquired as he sat in one of the chairs near the fountain.   
  


"Master is angry with me for completing our project. By obeying the council, I defied him. I should have obeyed him, but how I could I go against the wishes of the council?" Obi-Wan said as he sighed and sat down next to Master Windu.   
  


"Qui-Gon is always out to defy the council. Ignore his fits of anger; they tend to pass with time. But, there is something deeper to it, Obi-Wan, yet you guard your thoughts. Why do you hide them?" Mace stated.   
  
  
  


"Because they are foolish," Obi-Wan murmured. "I don't wish to discuss foolish things. I need to dismiss the feelings on my own."   
  


"That's perfectly respectable, but be careful, young one," Mace stated gently. "Anger is a dangerous creature to have dwelling in your heart. Don't let it control you."   
  


"I won't, Master Windu," Obi-Wan replied.   
  


The older master nodded, yet something began to trouble him as well. Obi-Wan was such a bright padawan filled with a passion very few were able to capture. A certain spark dwelled in his eyes, but it seemed as though Qui-Gon continued to try to extinguish the flame. So far, he noted, Qui-Gon hadn't been successful, but what would happen to the jedi when the passion and spark was gone from Obi-Wan Kenobi?   
  


"What are your feelings toward the mission?" Mace inquired.   
  


"Elusive," Obi-Wan stated simply. Upon receiving no reply, he elaborated, "there is something strange about it. I feel as though something is there calling me to this mission. I sense darkness, not evil exactly, but darkness... hopelessness. But, whenever I try to focus upon the specific things I feel, it seems unclear, disrupted."   
  


"Because you're tired, Padawan Kenobi. Remember, even the jedi need rest, despite popular belief. Go to your quarters, young one, you'll need plenty of rest for this mission," Mace said, giving Obi-Wan a reassuring pat on the back. He stood and after giving the boy another warning about returning to his quarters, Mace strolled out of the gardens.   
  


Obi-Wan stared at the fountain again, making the pool silent and still. "I am nothing but a thorn in my master's side," he whispered, finally able to release the thought he buried deep down, away from Master Windu. 


	3. Lost and Jaded

A Rose's Thorn   
  


A/N : Hi! Thanks again for the reviews; they truly keep me interested and inspired in this project. Well, happy spring break! I might, actually, get a few chapters done this week. *smiles* So, I've given a lot of thought to this chapter. There are several things I want to get accomplished with this one, yet at the same time, I don't want to rush the story along. We'll see how it goes, hm? =)   
  
  
  


Chapter 3 : Lost and Jaded   
  


"This is over my head but underneath my feet 

Because by tomorrow morning I'll have this thing beat 

And everything will be back to the way it was 

I wish that it was just that easy 

I'm waiting for tonight then waiting for tomorrow 

And I am somewhere in between 

What is real and just a dream." 

~Lifehouse : Somewhere in between   
  
  
  
  
  


After exhaling a deep breath, Qui-Gon Jinn's haunting green orbs gazed around at the surrealistic view of the Couresant skyline. From the landing platform, it seemed as though he could see every structure in the planetary city. He shifted his gaze from the skyline to the sky itself. The sun was beginning to lazily stretch and reach into the dawn, discarding his velvet blanket of night. A hint of a breeze gently touched Qui-Gon's face and brushed through his long, dusty brown locks as the doors to the jedi temple were opened behind him.   
  


"Good morning, Masters," Qui-Gon murmured without turning around to offer any sort of further acknowledgment to his peers.   
  


"Where is your padawan, Master Jinn?" Mace Windu inquired.   
  


The weary master closed his eyes for a moment and reached through the bond he shared with his young padawan. After a moment, he opened his eyes and simply stated, "He's still in the gardens. He felt the need to meditate in order to regain his focus about the mission."   
  


"Concerned, you appear not," the astute green troll said as he moved to stand beside the much taller master. "Strange, I find this."   
  


"And why is that? My padawan often needs to meditate before serious missions. There is nothing abnormal about that," Qui-Gon stated with a hint of annoyance.   
  


"Qui-Gon," Mace began, lowering his tone slightly, "there is something young Obi-Wan was hiding from me last night. I visited him during his meditation. He was caught completely off-guard; we both know how highly unusual that is for him. When I discussed the mission with him, he continued to keep something hidden."   
  


"He often feels weak by his insecurities," Qui-Gon said with a slight shrug of his broad shoulders. "I'm sure it's nothing."   
  


"So sure, are you? Know the cause for your padawan's sudden... 'insecurities'?" Yoda inquired.   
  


Qui-Gon released a sigh of pure annoyance, "If you don't know, then how do you expect me to know? I do not appreciate this inquisition before I depart for such a mission."   
  


"Expect you to know, we do, because his master you are. Nothing means your appreciation of our actions when appreciation you have not for your padawan. Amazed, we are, that you call him yours. Amazed more, are we, that Obi-Wan allows you to," Yoda said with a slight shake of his green head.   
  


A retort was about to be fired viciously from Qui-Gon's rebellious spirit, but Mace quickly stepped in to quell the foreseen fight, "Qui-Gon, there is an unusual amount of anger dwelling in your padawan. Obi-Wan has never been the sort to keep anger, and he certainly would never hide it. Something caused this sudden change in him."   
  


"Anger?" Qui-Gon inquired softly as a sudden twinge of concern filled him.   
  


"Yes, Qui-Gon, pure anger. Fear is usually the path to anger, and anger leads into hatred. We can not risk losing him to the dark side. What caused fear to fill Obi-Wan in order to lead him to this state?" Mace continued.   
  


The weary master was eerily silent for a few moments. "Fear of many things, I suppose," Qui-Gon murmured. "Fear of failure. Fear of defiance. Fear of rebellion. Fear of becoming like his master..."   
  


Qui-Gon released another sigh and allowed his green orbs another view into the surreal city. He caused his padawan pain, but didn't he realize that all along? Why had concern filled him now when his padawan had cried out to him through their bond constantly? Why was it in the silence after an inquiry that he suddenly felt the guilt from his previous actions? But did it matter? He had lost count of how many times such an inquiry and such a guilt had appeared, and each time he pieced back together the fragile puzzle that existed between him and his padawan. But, after a few days - if it lasted that long - the puzzle was ripped apart, and the sick cycle began all over again.   
  


But anger from Obi-Wan had never before been a factor. There were often hints of fear and guilt, but never had it lead to anger. Surely Obi-Wan knew better than to give in to the anger, or had Qui-Gon taught him nothing? Somewhere, deep down in the abyss of Qui-Gon's cold heart, he knew how amazing his padawan was. Little things reminded him constantly of how precious Obi-Wan was - when he stepped into a room, a certain sparkle danced in everyone's eyes; when he spoke, everyone hung upon his every word; when he left, a certain piece of everyone's heart would break. Perhaps, somehow, Qui-Gon was envious of Obi-Wan; envious because no one had ever accepted him or Xanatos in that same way.   
  


To feel envious toward his padawan was worse than anything, for from envy sprung his constant temper fits which lead to mistreatment of such a beautiful padawan. Secretly he wished Obi-Wan had been given the opportunity to have another master, for he deserved better. Qui-Gon didn't need any sort of introspective meditation to conclude how scrambled and jaded his emotions were inside; despite the splendor that was Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon found himself incapable of love. He was thoroughly convinced he was nothing but a failure; if Obi-Wan could become a jedi, at least Qui-Gon would have done one thing right, but even then, Obi-Wan could end up being permanently scarred from his horrid excuse for a master.   
  


"A failure you are not," Yoda said gently, as he placed a clawed hand against Qui-Gon's arm reassuringly. "Accept your faults you do, but correct them you do not. In order to mend his heart, mend yours you must."   
  


"Master Yoda," Qui-Gon replied, "mine is beyond repair."   
  


"Until you allow yourself to heal, destroy Obi-Wan, you will," Yoda stated.   
  


The debate could have continued for days, weeks perhaps, but suddenly all became silent between the inquiring pair and weary jedi for the source of their debate was strolling through the doors of the jedi temple. A look often held by that of a lost child in search of his parent and confidence was wearily tossed by the waves in Obi-Wan sea-change orbs.   
  


"Good morning, Masters," Obi-Wan's soft, accent-filled tone stated as he gave the usual and expected bow to the three standing before him. He turned his gaze strictly to his master and said, "I'm sorry if I'm late, Master. I started to meditate and lost track of time."   
  


"You're forgiven, Padawan," Qui-Gon said, "but, how did you lose track of time? You never have that problem."   
  


"I.. I don't know, Master. I think, perhaps, I was a little too tired. Master Windu told me to get my rest last night, but I continued my meditation in our quarters," Obi-Wan murmured.   
  


"You can sleep on our way to Hoth, Padawan," Qui-Gon said, then he turned his attention to the other masters present. "If you'll excuse us, Masters, I believe we've kept them waiting long enough."   
  


"Of course, you must go. Padawan Kenobi, please try to rest; you mustn't push yourself so. Remember what I told you last night. Master Jinn, do look after your padawan," Mace stated.   
  


"And may the Force be with you," Yoda added.   
  


"Yes, Masters," the star-crossed pair stated together as they bowed and began the walk toward the ship.   
  


"Danger lies ahead," Yoda murmured. "If healing does not take place, in control darkness will be."   
  


~*~   
  


Upon stepping inside the 'Eternal Darkness', the star-crossed master and padawan realized the true reality of the ship's name. Although spacious, light was sparse within the ship. It was dimly lit, enough to where the ship's interior could be seen, yet dark enough to protect the fragile creatures of Hoth. Barriers that appeared to be soft, blue, electric currents bounced in the doorways. Qui-Gon squinted and peered through one; his gaze was met by Ambassador Wespero's chuckle and a motion to step through. With a nod, Qui-Gon stepped through the blue wall to be met by a surprising burst of heat as he reached the other side. Obi-Wan followed his master's lead and was instantly amazed by the ship's technology.   
  


"Forgive the darkness, but this is the only way we're able to travel without being covered in layers of cloaks," Wespero said with more noticeable hints of an accent available since his tone wasn't as soft and polite. Although still mostly covered in black attire, his face was finally visible. Soft, onyx locks hinted by sapphire throughout adorned his head with a few sections of his tresses kissing his eyebrows. His skin appeared to be like marble - mostly a milky shade of white accented by swirls of pale blue. His lips also held a faint tint of blue.   
  


"Could you explain this light sensitivity? Our jedi weapons consist of a bright light, and I'm worried we could cause a problem," Qui-Gon stated.   
  


"Only intense amounts of light burn us. We are able to have dim lamps, candle light, and laser-powered light. You see, our kingdom exists on what we usually call the dark side of Hoth. The majority of the year is spent in total darkness with the exception of moonlight, but there is about a week or two when we receive direct sunlight. We live underground to protect ourselves from the light and cold. Since we exist in darkness, light burns us horribly," Wespero explained.   
  


"Wes, Kieran says we're about to lift-off," stated the familiar, fear-accented voice of Vera as she slowly stepped beside Wespero. Long curls with the same sapphire-tinted, black hue as Wespero's cascaded to the middle of her back. Although Wespero was nearly a foot taller than Vera, they both held the same mysteriously demanding gaze that could not be ignored or resisted. "Greetings Master Jinn and Padawan Kenobi."   
  


Before proper salutations could commence, the inside of the 'Eternal Darkness' was suddenly filled with intensely bright light. It appeared that every light upon the ship had been turned on at once. Vera suddenly cried as she endured the agony of the burning sensation the light caused.   
  


"Sister!" Wespero yelled as he quickly wrapped his arms around the smaller woman and covered her as best he could, "Kieran! What the hell happened?!"   
  


The star-crossed master and padawan quickly moved their hands and willed the lights to extinguish their sudden radiance. Vera, although trembling, breathed a sigh of relief. Large, jagged, black marks appeared on Wespero's otherwise flawless, marble-like skin. Vera nervously ran a hand against her brother's cheek to which he flinched slightly.   
  


"Brother, I'm so sorry... You were hurt because of me," Vera whispered.   
  


"No, I was hurt because of that damned, irresponsible imbecile that's flying the ship," Wespero growled as he suddenly stormed toward the cockpit.   
  


Vera slowly sat down in one of the leather-covered seats and motioned for the jedi pair to do so as well. "I sense your worries, and I'm very grateful for it. But, I assure you, it's not necessary. I'm alright, I promise, and my brother will be alright too. Thank you for using your jedi magic to turn the lights out for us." 

"How did you sense our worry?" Obi-Wan inquired.   
  


Suddenly the star-crossed pair heard Vera's voice in their head on a wavelength similar to their bond, yet different somehow, "Did you think jedi were the only ones capable of such a feat?" She grinned slightly.   
  


"How did you.." Obi-Wan breathed in pure astonishment.   
  


"They're Force-sensitive, Padawan, just like us, but to a different degree," Qui-Gon stated as he tried to focus his thoughts although just as perplexed as Obi-Wan.   
  
  
  


~*~   
  
  
  


"Kieran, what the hell happened?" Wespero growled.   
  


"Accident," Kieran replied nonchalantly. "I started up the engines, and the buttons controlling the lights began to flicker as though there was a malfunction. I hit the button in order to correct the error, and the lights all turned on. But, thanks to your jedi friends, I believe we don't have to worry with that anymore."   
  


"We better not have to worry with it anymore. If anything else happens-" Wespero started.   
  


"Don't worry, 'Ambassador', it's just fine. Nothing else will malfunction; I'm sure of it." Kieran purred.   
  


Wespero stormed out of the cockpit, and Kieran grinned a grin similar to that possessed by the Cheshire Cat. He touched a gloved finger to another button, and a small square appeared in the viewscreen. A beautiful, jewel-adorned woman appeared within that square.   
  


"Did they enjoy their little sneak preview to the main event?" the woman inquired.   
  


"Yes, your majesty. I think they had a splendid time," Kieran replied.   
  


"Delightful. Quyah will escort them into the throne room when you arrive. I will see you later, my dear," the woman purred.   
  


"As you wish, your majesty," Kieran replied with a smirk as he clicked the button again causing the square to vanish.   
  


~*~   
  


"We aren't able to use your Force in the same manner," Wespero explained, sitting beside his sister. "We have a strong sensitivity to emotional and mental states, which is how we've learned to speak telepathically. However, we don't have the power of the Jedi; we merely sense emotions."   
  


"There are some though, who are filled with evil and manipulate emotions," Vera added. 

"We suspect Queen Umbria of being one of those individuals. We also believe she used her manipulations on the previous group of jedi," Wespero stated.   
  


"But, how could manipulations cause four jedi to mysteriously vanish? There must be something more to it than that," Qui-Gon said.   
  


"Exactly," Wespero said with a slight nod of his head. "That's another reason why were in need of jedi assistance specifically. We are unable to read her mental state, and therefore, we don't know what to expect next from her."   
  


"Does your queen know we're coming?" Qui-Gon asked.   
  


"No, not exactly," Vera whispered.   
  


"So you went behind your queen's back just because of a slight suspicion? You defied your queen-" Qui-Gon started.   
  


"They had no choice," Obi-Wan jumped in, suddenly wanting to protect the fragile pair. "They've done nothing wrong."   
  


"Just like you, hm?" Qui-Gon inquired, giving their bond that familiar sudden, sharp tug and a slight glare.   
  


After sensing the conflicting emotional states between the star-crossed pair, Wespero quickly suggested, "Obi-Wan, would you like to see the rest of the ship? I sense you have a little curiosity toward it."   
  


Obi-Wan nodded and quickly followed Wespero through the energy-door. After a few minutes of awkward silence passed, Vera slowly stood and crossed the small space. She sat beside Qui-Gon and stared at him for a few moments.   
  


"Yes?" he inquired, slightly disturbed yet intrigued at the same time by the strange girl.   
  


"Pain stirs in your soul," Vera stated simply.   
  


"You know, it's quite fascinating how Force-sensitive you are," Qui-Gon said, casually attempting to change the subject. "If Hoth was located in the Republic, I'm sure you would have been trained at the temple."   
  


"Pain stirs in your soul," Vera repeated.   
  


Qui-Gon sighed and ran a slightly calloused hand through his locks, "Well, yes, it does. And what else do you sense?"   
  


"Why won't you release it?" she inquired.   
  


"Well, little one, that's a complicated subject," Qui-Gon replied.   
  


"Only because you make it so. Let the past remain in the past where it belongs. Let the future remain in the future where it belongs. Exist only in the present; that will begin to ease the pain. You relive too many events and replay too many foreseen events. You tell Padawan Kenobi to focus on the here-and-now, yet you do not," she said.   
  


"You see things too well, young one," Qui-Gon murmured.   
  


"You could see the very same things, but you're blinded by the past. The only way you know to release that built-up pain is to try to direct it at Padawan Kenobi. Just because you won't love anymore doesn't mean he will stop, and that, Master Jinn, is what hurts you so. It's the fact that you were hurt and can't love, yet you hurt him constantly yet he still loves," Vera said softly.   
  


The weary jedi didn't reply, for he was too lost in his own thoughts. Vera's comments twisted inside him like a thousand swords. Truth hung upon each word she spoke which forced the swords to cut his heart even more deeply.   
  


"Master Jinn, he isn't a thorn in your side," her voice echoed softly through his thoughts as she tried to establish a bond. "You are the thorn in his side." 


	4. Forbidden Frost

A Rose's Thorn   
  


A/N : Hi! Thanks for the reviews! Those comments made me very happy. *smiles* Sorry for over-using "star-crossed"; I just haven't found another phrase that describes them so perfectly. Also, I'm sorry for the delay on posting this chapter. My phone lines were down so I wasn't able to upload. *weeps* Also, just to save us all from confusion, anything in ~:: ::~ is when they're talking through a bond.   
  
  
  


Chapter 4 : Forbidden Frost   
  


"We stumble in a tangled web 

Decaying friendships almost dead 

And hide behind a mask of lies 

We twist and turn and avoid 

All hope of salvage now devoid 

I see the truth inside your eyes." 

~Savage Garden : "A Thousand Words"   
  
  
  


Haunting, presently the palest shade of blue accented by hints of gray, orbs peered through one of the small windows in the upper room of the 'Eternal Darkness'. As the stars drifted by, the young padawan's thoughts seemed to follow each of them. Pain twisted deeply in his torn soul, but there was nothing he could do to mend such a wound. Anger, however, seemed more than willing to fill the emptiness in Obi-Wan Kenobi's heart. He knew it was wrong, horribly wrong, yet anger's warm embrace wasn't one he truly wanted to resist.   
  


He often wondered why he shouldn't hold feelings of resentment toward his Master. Although Qui-Gon had so 'graciously' allowed the young padawan to be placed in his care, he hadn't been able to love Obi-Wan as he should. Of course, Obi-Wan understood that his master was in pain due to previous occurrences that were not to -ever- be brought up as a topic of conversation, but after five years had passed, the young padawan often wondered why Qui-Gon couldn't make room for him in his cold, broken heart. Obi-Wan was more than willing to try to undo the pain and agony that constantly tormented his master, yet Qui-Gon wasn't able to see that. Too many things taunted Qui-Gon : rebellion, anger, pain, torment, deception, defiance. Of course, defiance, the unforgivable sin in the weary master's eyes; a sin Obi-Wan hadn't intentionally committed, yet regardless, could not be forgiven for. Although defiance, and everything else that haunted Qui-Gon, was not at all a part of Obi-Wan Kenobi's nature, the young padawan wasn't allowed the proper place he deserved within his master's heart.   
  


"Perhaps he's forgotten how to love," Wespero murmured gently after sensing the strange array of emotions the young jedi padawan emitted.   
  


"It's been five years. In five years' time, I haven't managed to prove myself worthy of my master's love. I.. I've tried to be the perfect padawan, yet it's never good enough. It's ironic really," Obi-Wan said, glancing at Wespero for a moment then back to the shooting stars, "to think that Master Jinn is probably the grandest of the jedi; perhaps even a better swordsman than any of the council members. He has this amazing connection to the living Force; he cares so deeply for other life forms - well, the life forms that aren't directly linked to him and risk touching his heart. According to the council, I'm one of best padawans to ever reside at the temple. They claim I have a connection with the Force that no one else possesses. With those facts in mind, Master Jinn and I are regarded as the best jedi-padawan team at the temple. Despite those facts and my over-all admiration for him, we have the worst relationship of any jedi-padawan team in the history of the temple."   
  


"You exaggerate, Obi-Wan, but it's understandable. You're so deeply hurt by him, yet you continue to love him. Why is that?" Wespero inquired.   
  


"Because, five years ago I was destined for farming since there wasn't a master available to train me. Master Jinn, after a long while of debating and pondering and council harassment, took me as his padawan. He gave me a chance to become a jedi knight, and that is worth everything to me," Obi-Wan said.   
  


"There's something deeper than that," Wespero commented.   
  


"No, no.. that's all," Obi-Wan stammered as he tried to bury the sudden emotions that longed to take hold of his weary, wounded heart.   
  


"Obi-Wan, you have a very special gift. Everyone around you can see it, except one person..." Wespero said as he stepped closer to the young padawan and placed a reassuring hand upon his shoulder, "No, it's not your master. He can see your gift, but he chooses to ignore it; he's afraid of it. No, Obi-Wan, -you- are the one who fails to recognize the gift you possess."   
  


Obi-Wan cast a quizzical glance at Wespero to which the Hothian ambassador continued, "You are completely selfless. That's a quality very few possess, jedi included. In being so selfless, you long to ease the pain of everyone around you. The funny thing is, you do ease the pain. I'm sure just looking at you can ease any girl's - and some boy's - troubles instantly. But, you have this way about you..."   
  


"But what does that have to do with my master?" Obi-Wan inquired.   
  


"Everything," Wespero stated. "Your master has unresolved issues that he dwells upon constantly. He aches in a way that mere words can not express. In being so selfless, you want to ease his pain more than anything else in this universe. But, he pushes you away; he won't allow you to use your gift to help him. In some ways, he wants to save himself, yet he knows he can not; well, he doesn't know that yet, but he will. He hurts you, young one, he hurts you because he doesn't know how else to deal with your constant waves of love."   
  


"I suppose that's true from a certain point-of-view," Obi-Wan murmured, his tone suddenly slightly colder, "but I don't see things that way."   
  


"Because you're lost in a realm of guilt and insecurity. Since your master suffers, you blame yourself. Every slight hint of a mistake, you see as the ultimate doom. You're hard on yourself, Obi-Wan, but you mustn't be. Qui-Gon's pain isn't your fault-" Wespero said gently.   
  


"If I'm so gifted, his pain would be gone," Obi-Wan whispered.   
  


"No, it isn't that easy, and you know that. He is one of the few people in this universe that resists your charms, and you aren't quite sure how to handle that. Be patient, young one; patience is one of those virtues the jedi should possess," Wespero said. After a few moments of awkward silence passed, a certain dismal expression often etched upon the young padawan's face took hold of Wespero's. "It's a pity you can't use your gift to help yourself. It amazes me you care so deeply for him when he hurts you so."   
  


"We should be landing soon," Obi-Wan murmured.   
  


"You are a wonderful person, Obi-Wan; don't let him tell you differently," Wespero said, "and most importantly, young one, you are not a thorn in his side. Never."   
  
  
  


~*~   
  


Hoth was a sight far from lovely to behold. It lacked color, for the terrain consisted mostly of white blankets of snow with the occasional slate-gray mountain peak escaping the frozen whirlwinds. It lacked life, for the surface was unable to house the living creatures. As the 'Eternal Darkness' soared along the Hothian skyline, the planet was slowly being engulfed in darkness. The 'Dark Side' of Hoth was abandoned by the faint hints of sunlight, with the exception of two weeks during their so-called summer and the few hours of moonlight they received.   
  


::~"Master,"~:: Obi-Wan called softly through their shared bond, ::~"I have a dreadful feeling about this."~::   
  


::~"I sense a certain distress among the people, but nothing dreadful,"::~ Qui-Gon replied.   
  


::~"I sense something... menacing. There's something lurking within this planet's darkness, but I can't explain exactly what it is. It's something dreadful, Master,"::~ Obi-Wan said.   
  


It was a forced conversation; they both accepted that fact. If they were to truly speak, they would tread upon the weary bridge that kept them connected. Upon setting a foot upon that bridge, they were faced with two risks : to successfully heal the deeply buried wounds or to destroy the bridge and fall into an endless abyss of sorrow. Although Obi-Wan was more than willing to run across that bridge, Qui-Gon would, perhaps, never be able to set a foot upon it.   
  


The 'Eternal Darkness' landed gently upon the shadowy surface of Hoth. The jedi and padawan followed the Hothian ambassador and his sister through one energy door and to the lower level of the ship. Wespero and Vera quickly began to remove a layer of slate-gray paneling from the floor. Before the jedi or padawan could begin their inquisition, another blue energy door was revealed.   
  


"This is how we leave the ship and enter one of the areas of the kingdom. It is too cold to walk directly to any one point, and sometimes the moonlight is a little to fierce," Vera explained softly.   
  


"Just step upon the energy door, and you'll slide through this one and another and land upon a platform," Wespero stated.   
  


Sensing a skeptical feeling from the jedi, Vera stepped upon the door first and quickly slipped through. Obi-Wan followed and landed next to Vera upon the platform. Qui-Gon, still not particularly happy with such a strange concept, followed his padawan. After a few moments of rearranging panels, Wespero stepped upon the door with the larger panel held above his head. As he stepped through the door, he tossed the panel in the air which landed back in its proper position just as he landed on the platform.   
  


"When we arrive in the palace," Wespero stated as he pushed a few buttons on the keypad located in the center of the slate-gray wall, "Vera will show you where to go. I will deal with the queen and announce you properly."   
  


The platform slowly lowered itself down the tunnel that lead to the Hothian palace. After a few minutes, the seeming wall in front of the group opened and revealed a vision of beauty to the weary eyes of the jedi and padawan. Dimly lit, lantern-like structures hung from the ceiling and also adorned areas of the walls casting a tan glow against the basic gray. Scents of certain oils and perfumes lingered down the intricate, winding hallways. Wispy draperies of silk and satin hung exotically from the ceiling and brushed against the young padawan's flawless face.   
  


"Just wait until you see the throne room," a soft voice stated after reading the amazement from the young padawan.   
  


"Quynah, what are you-" Wespero began to inquire.   
  


"Hush now, 'Ambassador'. We know all about your treachery, yet despite that, the queen still wishes to see the jedi you have brought to us," Quynah stated without any sort of emotion present in her tone.   
  


"But how did you-" Wespero began again.   
  


"That is not important, 'Ambassador'. The issue the queen wishes to address is that of the jedi, not you. But, do not worry, Wespero, the queen shall deal with you later. Step aside, Wespero, I must speak to our esteemed guests," Quynah said.   
  


Wespero moved protectively toward his sister as the jedi and padawan stepped toward the strange girl. She appeared to be the same age as Obi-Wan, perhaps a year older. Her sapphire-hued hair hung daintily at her chin with one shorter layer falling across her face and hiding her left eye slightly. Her eyes were dark - darker than surrounding shadows - and held a certain element of mystery. Swirls of powdery blue accented her flawless ivory skin. Layers of intricately-designed satin, each in a different shade, wrapped around her thin figure. Pale blue, topaz jewels accented her attire and sparkled in her choppy tresses. Obi-Wan was enthralled.   
  


"Greetings esteemed jedi," the girl stated in a thick accent - every vowel was pronounced with near exaggeration for the purpose of emphasis and speech, in general, was slow, "I am Quynah, the queen's personal attendant. She is very pleased to have such guests; it is not often we have such guests."   
  


"I'm Master Qui-Gon Jinn and this is my padawan, Obi-Wan Kenobi," he stated.   
  


"How intriguing. We were sent four masters before," Quynah murmured.   
  


"I assure you, we are the best the temple has to offer. We can settle every problem-" Obi-Wan stated, suddenly wanting to impress.   
  


"I would not be so over-confidant, Obi-Wan Kenobi," Quynah replied with a hint of laughter. "Please, follow me."   
  


The strange girl turned and escorted the jedi and padawan through the maze of winding hallways. Wespero and Vera trailed behind with a look of fear dancing in their sapphire orbs.   
  


::~"Brother,"~:: Vera whispered through their bond, ::~"how did they find out?"~::   
  


::~"I'm not sure,"~:: he replied, ::~"but they won't harm you, I swear it."~::   
  


::~"Wes..."~:: Vera murmured.   
  


::~"Umbria will probably send me to the tower, but you must watch over our jedi friends. If anything should happen to them..."~:: Wespero stated.   
  


::~"Wes,"~:: Vera whispered with fear hanging upon the mention of his name.   
  


::~"Promise me, Sister, promise me you'll try your best to watch over them,"~:: he pleaded.   
  


::~"Of course, Brother,"~:: she replied.   
  


Obi-Wan remained enthralled by the exotic visual display of the underground castle. Never before had he seen something so intricately artistic yet ultimately dark and mysterious at the same time. The sight distracted his Force senses which was exactly what the queen's attendant wanted.   
  


With soft footsteps, Quynah entered the queen's throne room and motioned for the small group to enter.   
  


"Your majesty," Quynah stated with a slow, graceful bow, "I present before you Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn and his padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi. Also, Wespero and Vera wished to attend this meeting."   
  


"Our grand ambassador and his sister may be allowed to stay for now. My interest remains with the jedi," a voice stated from the shadows. The sound of her voice was an intoxicating melody which the jedi and padawan struggled to ignore. With a quick snap of her fingers, the queen's attendant moved to ignite the flames of the lanterns surrounding the queen. Once the soft glow cascaded upon the queen, her beauty seemed to fill the room with more radiance. Straight layers of black hair framed her face in varying lengths - the shortest strands kissed her cheeks and the longest hung to her knees; on the very end of each layer, a sapphire hue accented her lovely tresses. Her skin was a flawless milky shade with swirls of powder-blue so intricate that they looked as though a grand artistic visionary painted them each day with such care in each stroke of his brush. Bright, topaz orbs were punctuated by long, black, painted lines, making them appear much larger. Her black-painted lips were full and glossy. Her delicately slender frame was covered in a gown of black satin. The sleeves, long and wispy faded from black to silver and revealed her dainty hands and silver-painted nails. The end of her gown matched the sleeves, fading to silver. Various silver chains with topaz jewels were wrapped around her neck, wrists, ankles, and waist. Atop her head rested a silver head-dress decorated with topaz and sapphire jewels.   
  


"Your majesty," the jedi and padawan stated together, bowing slightly and seemingly unaware of her beauty, for both saw the darkness that lurked within her.   
  


"Master Qui-Gon Jinn," she stated with a slight nod of her head. "I am glad the jedi sent such a master. I sense much strength in you."   
  


She turned her attention to the young padawan at his side and suddenly smiled wickedly. "Obi-Wan Kenobi," she stated slowly; her accent made his name suddenly sound exotic and seductive, "how delightful."   
  


"Your majesty, we come on behalf of the jedi council to discuss-" Qui-Gon began.   
  


"No, no," Queen Umbria stated with a dismissing wave of her hand, "we mustn't have a discussion yet. I sense much tension within you and your padawan. We have a certain custom before having such discussions. A treatment of massage and healing oils tends to relieve the stressful feelings. I hate to have discussions in a stressful environment; it often leads to unsatisfying results."   
  


"As you wish, your majesty, but I must remind you, we haven't got all the time in the universe," Qui-Gon stated.   
  


"I find it rather amusing that the jedi are known for their undying patience, yet you can not spare the time to indulge in our custom. Tsk tsk, Master Qui-Gon Jinn. I assure you, it will not take long," the queen stated with hints of laughter in her tone.   
  


"Your grace," Quynah murmured, "which levels shall I use?"   
  


"Levels?" Obi-Wan inquired.   
  


"Oh, the levels, I hope you do not mind. As a precautionary element, during the treatment, we administer a small injection of antibiotics. We can never be sure what you bring in from the vastness of space into our small environment. Anything serious, and we would all die without a prayer," Quynah stated.   
  


The jedi and padawan nodded.   
  


"For Master Jinn, level one. As for Obi-Wan Kenobi," Umbria stated, a little too delighted to state his name so exotically again, "he has such young blood. Level four, just to be safe."   
  


"Level four?" Quynah inquired.   
  


"Yes, dear, level four. You may tend to him, and.. Vera, tend to Master Jinn," Umbria stated.   
  


"Yes, your majesty," the girls replied in unison.   
  


"You are dismissed. We shall meet again after your treatments," Umbria announced. "Ah, Wespero, would you be a dear and stay around? I have a little matter to discuss with you."   
  


As the jedi and padawan were lead into the maze of hallways, Wespero remained within the throne room and suddenly wished he could run away. He forced a confident facade and prayed his life would be spared for the sake of his sister.   
  


"My dear 'ambassador'," Umbria stated mockingly, "why did you call upon the jedi without asking me?"   
  


"The people were in need of them," Wespero replied.   
  


"Yet you did not even ask me," Umbria pressed.   
  


"You would've refused," Wespero said. 

"No, no, you see I enjoy the jedi. The other four were fun, for awhile..." Umbria stated with a wicked grin playing upon her black-painted lips.   
  


"What happened to them?" he inquired.   
  


"You will being seeing them soon enough. Ask them yourself. Now, my dear Wespero, let us list your crimes. You posed as an ambassador, stole my ship, deceived the jedi council, lured the jedi here, and defied me. Tsk tsk, off to the tower you go!" Umbria said.   
  


"But, how did you find out?" Wespero asked.   
  


"I have my sources, dear," Umbria purred as she tilted her head toward the door. Wespero suddenly turned and glanced in the same direction. To his dismay, Kieran stood leaning against the door-frame and offered a wicked smile and a wave.   
  


"Guards," she called, causing two black-armor clad men to come forth from the shadows, "take our little ambassador to the tower."   
  


"You'll pay for this, you evil witch!" Wespero yelled as the guards bound his hands together and escorted him away.   
  


Kieran strolled into the throne room with a wicked smile still playing upon his lips. The queen arose from her throne and with soft footsteps, she descended the few steps to the ground.   
  


"Mission accomplished, my queen," Kieran stated.   
  


Umbria stepped closer to him and wrapped her slender arms around him. Her fingertips played with the small ponytail that rested against his broad shoulders. "It would appear so," she purred.   
  


"Is there anything else you'd wish for me to do for you, my queen?" Kieran inquired.   
  


"Yes, actually," she purred.   
  


"Anything for you, my queen," he stated.   
  


"Tell me," she purred into his ear, "why you would be so deceptive to your friend, Wespero?"   
  


"Because he defied you. That horrible boy was nothing but a thorn in your side, my beautiful rose queen," Kieran stated.   
  


"Do not flatter me, for I know your affections lie in the heart of another," Umbria stated, inching away from him.   
  


"That isn't true," he purred, stepping closer to her and kissing along her neck and collarbone.   
  


"You were deeply in love with Wespero's sister. Do not lie to me, Kieran, I can see everything. You have no true affection for me, because I created the feeling. My dear, deceived Kieran, you honestly thought you were the only one so deceptive," Umbria purred.   
  


"I.. I don't understand," Kieran stammered.   
  


"Of course you don't, my little puppet," Umbria stated with laughter echoing around the room. "But, now that you know the truth, you will try to deceive and defy me. Guards, take him to the tower to join his dear friend."   
  


"No! I won't go!" Kieran yelled as he moved to strangle the queen.   
  


But Umbria was much too prepared. Her dainty hand moved to the thigh-high slit in her gown and grabbed the concealed weapon. She pushed her blaster against Kieran's chest and shot it several times. His body quickly fell to the floor to which she laughed again.   
  


"Such a silly little puppet. I need to find better puppets such as..." she murmured then suddenly purred, "Obi-Wan Kenobi."   
  
  
  



	5. Frigid Fate

A Rose's Thorn   
  


A/N : I'm dreadfully sorry it's taken so long to update. I really didn't know what to do with this chapter. I'm at an awkward point in the story. It's building up the turning point, but I'm not exactly sure how I want to get there. So, be patient on these next few chapters. I have no idea what lies directly ahead. However, if you'd like to know the ending.... *grins* So, anyway, it's time for shameless advertising! My little home on the web has finally gone from a cruddy space on geocities to a lovely domain! Yes, my beautiful dollhouse has finally been hosted! Feel free to visit and sign my guestbook if you'd like : http://wednesday.random-crapola.net *smiles*. Also, thank you SO much for the reviews. Those reviews are what kept me working on this chapter when I thought it was just going nowhere. In fact, I'm still not sure if it went anywhere... but if anything, Obi-Wan is quite lovely in this chapter (yes, more so than usual, and it is possible). Please keep reviewing and let me know if the story gets to be disappointing... I re-write chapters if I must. ~Nicole   
  
  
  
  
  


Chapter 5 : Frigid Fate   
  


"To die, to sleep; 

To sleep, perchance to dream. 

Aye, there's the rub, 

For in that sleep of death 

what dreams may come. . ." 

~"Hamlet" - William Shakespeare   
  
  
  
  
  


As he stood dressed in a pair of long, black, satin pants and matching robe that was left open just a tad too much, Obi-Wan Kenobi was a feast for the eyes. The room he was presently located within was a small, peaceful chamber. Silky pillows covered the limited floor space; some of the pillows rested against the walls making comfortable little corners for meditation. An enticing smell of various oils and incense gave the room an over-all exotic feeling. Small, intricately-designed lanterns hung from the ceiling, each holding one candle; they provided a soft glow that cascaded gently against Obi-Wan's olive-toned skin.   
  


With a few gentle steps upon the pillowed floor, Obi-Wan nearly tip-toed toward the cozy corner. Quynah had mentioned it might be awhile before she returned, and Obi-Wan certainly did not want to stand around and gaze at comfy pillows while his body ached to sit and rest awhile. It had been two days since the young padawan had slept. Although it was common for a jedi master to go for days without rest, Obi-Wan was, despite popular belief, just a gifted padawan who needed his rest desperately.   
  


After slowly sitting down in the mass of pillows, the sudden wave of comfort nearly caused the weary padawan to drift off to sleep right there. He struggled against the sudden heavy weight of his eyelids and forced his sea-change eyes to drift around a bit. In the soft glow, his orbs appeared gray with flecks of green sparkling within. It was an adorable sight really - an intoxicating, handsome padawan with half-open green eyes fighting off the need for sleep like a grumpy child determined to stay up past his bedtime.   
  


"I should meditate," Obi-Wan mumbled, pushing himself closer to the wall in hopes sitting up straighter might help him stay awake. But too his dismay, it did not help. There were too many distractions for him to resist in such a vulnerable state. Of course, that was to the delight of the queen's attendant as she strolled back into the room and stopped to stare at the lovely sight before her dark eyes. She was not exactly sure how long she had been staring, but she was awakened from her sudden trance by a faint hint of drool rolling down toward her chin. With a quick swipe of her hand, the drool was gone, but a faint, rosy blush still hung upon her otherwise pale cheeks.   
  


"Padawan Kenobi," she called softly, awakening the jedi who suddenly appeared quite embarrassed. "No, it's alright, do not be like that; you have no need to worry. You are very tired, and it is only natural to fall sleep when you are tired."   
  


"But a jedi must... stay awake... alert," he mumbled softly as he stretched and stood up slowly. As he moved, his robe opened a bit more, allowing the soft candlelight to cascade gently across his chest.   
  


Again Quynah was nearly persuaded to stop and stare, but the syringe in her hand reminded her of the tasks at hand. She softly treaded across the pillowed floor and until she reached the longest wall of the small room. Her slender fingertips gently tapped against a few buttons upon the keypad then stopped as a faint whirring noise was emitted from the wall. A narrow slit in the wall suddenly caused a long table to come out. Quynah pushed another button, locking the table in place when it seemed just long enough for Obi-Wan to lay down upon. She picked up a pillow from the corner and after placing it upon the table, she patted gently, "Come on, my little jedi," she said softly.   
  


With slow footsteps, the weary jedi eventually reached Quynah and her little table. He hopped up slightly and sat upon the table; his legs dangled back-and-forth as he sat and awaited further instruction.   
  


"Well, I suppose we should get the shot over with," she said softly as her eyes narrowed to gaze at the syringe. "You'll have to take that robe off, Padawan Kenobi."   
  


Obi-Wan nodded and untied the satin belt. He shrugged his shoulders slightly, allowing the satin rope to slide delicately off his shoulders. The candlelight surrounding the handsome padawan seemed to nearly make him glow; it was moments such as this when Quynah truly loved her job more than anything else in the galaxy.   
  


With such delicate fingers, it was a few minutes before the syringe was in place. She nearly cringed as it neared Obi-Wan's tender flesh. Suddenly his hand touched hers so softly that a chill ran down her spine and goose bumps tingled along her arm.   
  


"You seem a little nervous, Miss Quynah. Don't worry, this won't hurt me or anything," he said in his soft accent as he gently guided her hand toward his awaiting arm. "You don't give the shots often, do you?"   
  


"No," she murmured, "usually Vera gives the shots to the not-so-very special guests, and her majesty often tends to the jedi herself. Well, she did last time..." She placed the needle against his skin slightly and pushed the syringe until the blue formula was gone. With a gentle sort of care, she removed the needle and rubbed his slightly-red arm.   
  


"Why did she tend to the jedi herself?" Obi-Wan inquired.   
  


"You will find out soon enough, Padawan Kenobi," she whispered, nearly inaudibly as she cast a dismal gaze to the syringe. She lightly tapped another few buttons until another slit opened. She tossed the empty syringe inside and closed the tiny door. "No more questions; it makes it difficult to release the tension if you continue to trouble yourself with silly questions."   
  


"I suppose you're right," Obi-Wan murmured, still dying to ask a million questions but too tired to argue with the determined attendant.   
  


After sensing his curiosity, Quynah stated softly, "My little jedi, you will soon have all the answers you seek and perhaps a few more. Trust me, Padawan Kenobi, you truly don't want to know anything in advance."   
  


"What's that supposed to mean?" Obi-Wan inquired.   
  


She shifted her gaze toward her feet and to anything other than the weary padawan before her. Guilt was slowly beginning to wrap its cold arms around the slender girl, but she kept her conflicting emotions guarded from him. He would know soon enough, she noted, so why trouble him anymore. "Nothing truly," Quynah finally said, tapping her delicate fingers against the pillow. "Do not worry yourself with questions. You are very tired, Padawan Ken-"   
  


"Obi-Wan," he corrected with a hint of his charming smile tugging at his lips.   
  


"Obi-Wan," she repeated. "Now, shall we begin your treatment? I assure you, you shall feel much better once some of the tension is released. You can even nap, if you like. I promise I will not report it to your master..."   
  


"That would be lovely," Obi-Wan replied, offering his smile as he slowly stretched out upon the table. Although he usually preferred to sleep upon his back, at this point he truly didn't care whether he was comfortable or not. He tilted his head to the left, glancing at Quynah for a moment. There was something about her, he pondered, but he wasn't quite sure what. Something elusive... The same dark feeling from his previous meditations draped itself over Obi-Wan's clouded mind.   
  
  
  


~*~   
  
  
  


With a rough push, the guards forced Wespero into what they so lovingly referred to as 'the tower'. He hadn't expected such a shove and ended up tumbling upon the floor, landing against a part of the wall within the dark chamber. After a loud slam, the door was closed, followed by the loud clicks of the various locks being put back in place.   
  


The Hothian 'ambassador' groaned softly, holding his side from where he hit the cold, stone wall. He squinted slightly to adjust his eyes to the much darker environment. A few small laser-powered lights lined the edges of the high ceiling. The room, he thought, was quite large, although oddly shaped. It seemed to be circular, but it was hard to judge in such dim lighting. He slowly moved his hand along the wall, pushing himself up to stand again. As he did so, he discovered a slight reflection coming off the wall. With his other hand he rubbed his eyes and squinted again. He moved his hand to the reflecting part of the wall, and nearly cried out from how bitterly cold the glass pane was. The middle portion of the wall was made of glass - a window to the terrain of Hoth. He noted the room wasn't as cold as the window itself, but suddenly a thought occurred to him. Sure, he had heard the rumors, but he hadn't believed anyone could be so cruel. The moon would be rising along the Hothian skyline soon, and its horrid beam would fill the tower with its light. He cringed and lightly touched the black, jagged scar upon his face from where the lights in the 'Eternal Darkness' had burned him.   
  


"Damn," he murmured, unsure of what to do to get himself out of such a predicament. He glanced around the room again once his eyes were better adjusted. As he stared across the length of the room, his gaze was met by three others.   
  


"Masters," Wespero breathed, moving across the room with hesitant footsteps.   
  
  
  


~*~   
  


The tall jedi master glanced around the small room. In appearances, it was similar to the one Obi-Wan was located in, but a different aura filled the room. The elusive darkness his padawan felt did not exist in this room. After taking another brief glimpse through their bond, Qui-Gon finally released a short sigh. A strange sort of concern for his padawan had slipped upon Qui-Gon like a coat which he took on-and-off whenever he so desired.   
  


Master Jinn did not like the attire provided by the Hothian palace and certainly did not want to wear it. But he also did not want to take the risk of causing an intergalactic dispute with such a frivolously warped queen, so he complied and dressed in a pair of blue, satin pants. He folded his arms across his bare chest; the robe was just going too far. After sensing the presence of Vera nearing the doorway, he turned to acknowledge her but gasped when she nearly collapsed. With his jedi speed, he rushed to the doorway to catch the fragile, young woman before she lost her grip upon the stone doorway.   
  


"Thank you, Master Jinn," she breathed, gasping slightly. Beads of sweat gently glided down her pale forehead and rested against her high cheekbones. She tried to push them away with her slender fingertips, but their constant tremble made the simple task nearly impossible.   
  


"What's wrong, Vera?" Qui-Gon asked gently.   
  


"Kieran's dead," she whispered.   
  


"Dead? But... how do you-" Qui-Gon inquired.   
  


"When we establish emotional ties with someone," Vera quickly explained, pausing suddenly to gasp for air, then returning to her speech constantly, "we can feel everything - happiness, sadness, pain, joy... everything, if the bond is strong enough. When someone dies, we feel what they were feeling... in Kieran's case, shock, confusion, grief.."   
  


As tears began to roll down the blue swirl upon her cheek, she quickly moved away from Qui-Gon. "We... we need to begin your treatment..." she murmured as she tapped upon the keypad and awaited the table's appearance.   
  


"Vera, it's alright. I can meditate quite nicely in here and relieve all the tension and stress. You need time to... deal with your emotions," he stated.   
  


"Deal with my emotions?" she said, turning suddenly, a strange look blazing in her dark eyes, "Spoken like a true jedi gentleman..."   
  


"And what's that supposed to mean?" Qui-Gon nearly snapped.   
  


"Jedi don't seem to enjoy emotions, not when they're directly involved. However, Padawan Kenobi is a different case. He thrives upon his emotions, and you don't like that. No, not at all, and certainly not when those emotions are directed at you," Vera stated.   
  


"Vera, your present emotional state is not related to-" Qui-Gon started to retort.   
  


"How do you know what it's related to, Master Jinn?" she hissed as a choked sob escaped her lips. "You don't know how to feel emotion any more, and you scorn those who do. You have no clue what emotions are related to because you are dead inside... you're cold and dead inside..."   
  


~*~   
  
  
  


Quynah sprinkled several drops of healing oils upon the young padawan's back and gently massaged his shoulders until it was absorbed. Of course, the process was very slow, not that the queen's attendant minded at all. "You carry your stress in your shoulders, my little jedi," she said softly, "and I must admit you have more stress than any other I have given the treatment to."   
  


"I can't imagine why," Obi-Wan mumbled softly.   
  


"I am sure I can imagine it," Quynah said, a hint of a smile tugging at her usual pensive frown. "The life of a jedi must be quite exciting, yet quite stressful. So many duties and obligations. So many rules and regulations."   
  


"Well, you can imagine it quite well," Obi-Wan replied.   
  


"So many things to do and people to see. So many things to learn and things to practice. So many people to teach and masters who speak yet have nothing to say," she said. She had hit a nerve; she could feel it. A sudden tension began to twist about his left shoulder. "Maybe not so many. Perhaps just one. One master who speaks to hear himself talk, for he knows no one else listens. One master who gives rules that can not be followed, for he enjoys punishing those who do not deserve it. One master so cold, cruel, over-bearing..."   
  


"He isn't like that," Obi-Wan whispered.   
  


"Oh really?" Quynah replied, nearly inaudibly. "Enlighten me, my little jedi."   
  


"He's just... been through some bad times. He doesn't know how to let go of things. He's disillusioned by the past, but he's an amazing Master, a glorious jedi knight, he's-" Obi-Wan whispered, struggling to justify his defense.   
  


"He does not treat you as you should be treated," Quynah murmured.   
  


"His treatment of me is just fine. Our quarters are very nice; he often cooks, but rarely cleans. He is a little cold, but it's understandable," he said.   
  


"He does not respect you as you should be respected," Quynah pressed on.   
  


"I am his padawan; I should respect him. As a master, he holds a different sort of respect for me. If he were to give too much, it would come as flattery and cause arrogance to swell within me," Obi-Wan said, clearly giving rehearsed answers - answers he had presented to the council, his friends, his admirers, to a queen's attendant.   
  


"He does not love you as you should be loved," Quynah stated. Again, she had struck a nerve, but this time it was a different sort of nerve.   
  


"But I love him, and that is all that matters," Obi-Wan replied.   
  


Guilt twisted within the queen's attendant. Why had she been given such a task? This one, her little jedi, would not be so easily misguided. A silent tear rolled down her cheek as she thought of what she knew was to come.   
  


"Oh my little jedi," she whispered, as Obi-Wan finally began to relax and drift off into a presently peaceful slumber, "I do hope he learns to love you. If he leaves you this time, my little jedi, I am not so sure you will be able to mend the pieces of your broken heart alone. Be strong, my little jedi."   
  


Another tear rolled down her porcelain cheek as she kissed his cheek softly. "I am so sorry, my little jedi. You will never believe you are not a thorn in his side; his words will never leave you. His lack of love will be your downfall, yet his offer of love may be your means of survival. But will he ever learn to open his heart? I am not so sure, my little jedi," she whispered, as if to prepare him for the worst. "If anything, be strong for me. I will save you from this if no one else will. I promise you, my little jedi... I promise." 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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